The Most Loving Thing You Haven’t Done Yet

The Most Loving Thing You Haven’t Done Yet

February is the month of love. We buy flowers, make dinner reservations, and write cards expressing what people mean to us. But there’s another way to show the people you love that you care—one that doesn’t involve chocolates or champagne, and one that most of us keep putting off.

Creating a Will.

We know. Not exactly romantic. But hear us out.
 

The Gift Nobody Wants to Think About

Estate planning has a PR problem. It feels morbid. Uncomfortable. Like tempting fate by acknowledging that someday, you won’t be here.

So we avoid it. We tell ourselves we’ll get to it later, when we’re older, when life is less busy, when the kids are grown, when things settle down.

But here’s the thing: avoiding your estate plan doesn’t protect the people you love. It just leaves them with a much harder job when you’re gone.

And if you really think about it—past the discomfort and the awkwardness—creating a Will is actually one of the most thoughtful, caring things you can do for your family.
 

What Love Actually Looks Like

Love isn’t just about the big gestures and the good times. It’s also about the practical stuff. The unsexy, behind-the-scenes work that makes someone else’s life easier.

It’s meal planning when your partner’s overwhelmed. It’s teaching your teenager to change a tire. It’s making sure there’s a working flashlight in the drawer when the power goes out.

Estate planning is the same kind of love. It’s anticipating a moment when your family will be under tremendous stress, and doing everything you can now to make that moment less difficult for them.

It’s saying: “I won’t be there to guide you through this, so I’m going to make it as clear and straightforward as possible.”

That’s not morbid. That’s deeply caring.
 

The Mess We Leave Behind

Without a Will, you’re not just leaving your family without instructions. You’re leaving them with decisions they shouldn’t have to make—especially not while they’re grieving.

Who gets what? Who’s in charge? What did you actually want? Would you have been okay with this? What about that old promise you made?

These questions don’t have obvious answers. And when people are stressed, exhausted, and emotional, even small uncertainties can spiral into major conflicts.

I’ve heard the stories. Siblings who stopped speaking over furniture. Families torn apart over bank accounts. Loved ones who spent months (or years) in legal limbo because the person who died never got around to putting their wishes in writing.

These aren’t bad people. They’re good people in an impossible situation, forced to guess at what someone would have wanted, with no way to know if they’re getting it right.

You can spare them that.
 

The Reluctance is Real

We get why this is hard. There are a lot of reasons people avoid creating a Will:

“I’m too young.” Fair enough—you probably are young. But life is unpredictable, and if you have people who depend on you (or assets you care about), you’re not too young to plan.

“I don’t have enough stuff.” You might have more than you think. But even if you don’t, a Will isn’t just about distributing wealth. It’s about naming guardians for your kids, choosing who makes decisions, and making sure your wishes are known.

“It’s too expensive.” It doesn’t have to be. And even if it costs something, consider the alternative: thousands of dollars in legal fees, court costs, and delays that your family will have to deal with later.

“I don’t want to think about dying.” Nobody does. But you also don’t want to think about your house burning down, and you still have insurance. Estate planning is the same idea—preparing for something you hope never happens.

“It’s too complicated.” Maybe. Or maybe you’re overthinking it. Most people don’t need elaborate trusts or complex structures. They just need a clear, legally valid document that says who gets what and who’s in charge.

The reluctance is normal. But it’s not a good reason to leave your family without a plan.
 

What You’re Really Saying

When you create a Will, you’re telling the people you love:

“I’ve thought about what happens next, and I want to make it as easy as possible for you.”

“I trust you with this responsibility, and I’m giving you the authority to carry it out.”

“I know this will be hard, so I’m handling the decisions I can handle now, so you don’t have to.”

“You matter to me, and I want you to be taken care of.”

That’s love. Not the greeting-card, sunset-photo kind of love—but the real, practical, showing-up kind of love that actually makes a difference.
 

The Conversations That Come With It

Creating a Will also opens the door to conversations that matter.

Who should be the executor? Who would you trust to raise your kids if something happened to both parents? How do you want things divided? What are your priorities?

These aren’t easy questions. But they’re important ones. And talking through them now—when there’s no pressure, no emergency, no grief clouding the conversation—makes everything easier later.

Plus, it gives your family clarity. They know what you want. They know what you were thinking. They don’t have to guess or assume or piece together your intentions after you’re gone.
 

That certainty is a gift in itself.

It’s Not Just About Death

Here’s something people don’t always think about: a Will is only part of estate planning. The other part—Powers of Attorney for property and personal care—is about protecting you while you’re still alive.

If you’re incapacitated and can’t make decisions, who steps in? Who manages your finances? Who makes medical decisions on your behalf?

Without these documents, your family might need to go to court just to get the legal authority to help you. That process is expensive, slow, and stressful—and it happens at exactly the moment when they need to be focused on your care, not paperwork.

Planning ahead doesn’t just protect your family after you’re gone. It protects them if something happens while you’re still here.
 

February is as Good a Time as Any

So why bring this up in February, the month of love?

Because if you’ve been putting off your estate plan, you need a reason to finally do it. And “showing the people I love that I care about their future” is a pretty good one.

You don’t need to make it a grand gesture. You don’t need to announce it over champagne. You can just quietly, privately, get it done—and know that you’ve given your family something more valuable than flowers.

You’ve given them clarity. Security. One less thing to worry about when life gets hard.

That’s love.
 

Getting Started is the Hardest Part

The good news? You don’t have to figure this out all at once.

Start by asking yourself a few basic questions:

• Who do I trust to manage my estate?
• If I have kids, who would I want to raise them?
• How do I want my assets divided?
• Who should make decisions for me if I can’t?

Once you have rough answers, the rest gets easier. And if you’re not sure where to start, tools like SmartWills can walk you through the process step by step, making sure you don’t miss anything important.

The hardest part is deciding to start. Everything else is just details.
 

This Valentine’s Day, Give Them Peace of Mind

Roses die. Chocolates get eaten. Cards get tucked in a drawer.

But a clear, complete estate plan? That’s something your family will be grateful for long after Valentine’s Day is over.

It’s a way of saying: I see you. I care about you. I want to make your life easier, even when I’m not here to do it myself.

And really, isn’t that what love is?

Ready to show your family you care? Creating a Will is one of the most loving things you can do—and SmartWills makes it simple. Contact Us