The Blended Family and Estate Planning: Why “My Children” Might Not Mean What You Think

The Blended Family and Estate Planning: Why “My Children” Might Not Mean What You Think

If you’re in a blended family—with stepchildren, biological children, or both—your Estate Plan requires extra care. What seems obvious in your daily life (“these are my kids”) may not translate the way you expect under Ontario law. Without precise planning, you risk unintentionally disinheriting the people you love most.

What Does “My Children” Actually Mean in a Will?

In Ontario, the default rule is clear: when a Will says “my children,” it means biological or legally adopted children only. Stepchildren are excluded unless you explicitly say otherwise.

This legal presumption exists for predictability, but it can clash painfully with reality. You might have raised your stepchildren for twenty years, paid for their education, walked them down the aisle, and think of them as your own—but if your will doesn’t say so explicitly, they may be left out entirely.

Courts Look Beyond Labels 

The lesson? Courts can look beyond legal labels to the substance of relationships, but only when the evidence is strong enough to prove the testator’s intent. Without that evidence, stepchildren will be excluded by default. To prove in court the value of these relationships requires time and money. They may also lead to intra-family conflict.

The Takeaway: Be Explicit

Don’t leave your loved ones to argue in court about what you meant. Here’s how to avoid ambiguity:

• If you want to include stepchildren, say so explicitly and name them if possible
• If you want to exclude stepchildren, clarify that too
• Avoid generic terms like “my children” or “my issue” unless you define exactly who you mean
• Review all beneficiary designations on registered accounts, insurance policies, and TFSAs to ensure consistency with your will

What Happens If You Die Without a Will?

If you die without a will in Ontario (called dying “intestate”), the Succession Law Reform Act steps in to decide who gets what. For the blended family, the results can be harsh.

Under the Act, your estate goes to your spouse and “issue”—meaning biological and legally adopted children only. Stepchildren are excluded, period.

This rule has been applied strictly across Canada. In the Alberta case, Peters v. Peters, a woman died without a will. She had treated her stepchildren as her own for years, but because she never legally adopted them, they received nothing. Her biological relatives inherited instead.

The law doesn’t care how close your relationship was or how long you’ve been a blended family. Without a will—or legal adoption—stepchildren have no inheritance rights on intestacy.

Can Stepchildren Ever Make a Claim?

Yes, but it’s not automatic. Stepchildren who were financially dependent on you may be able to bring a “dependant’s relief” claim under the Succession Law Reform Act, even if they’re not named in your will or entitled under intestacy rules.

To succeed, they must show that you stood in loco parentis—meaning you acted as their parent. Courts look at factors like:

• Whether you provided financial support
• Whether you disciplined and guided them as a parent would
• Whether you represented yourself to the world as their parent
• The length and permanency of the relationship
• Whether they participated in the extended family as your child

If the relationship was genuine and parental, a stepchild may obtain support from your estate—but this requires litigation, which is expensive, stressful, and uncertain.

The better approach? Don’t rely on the courts to “fix” an unclear plan. State your intentions clearly in your will and avoid forcing your loved ones into conflict.

Final Thoughts

The blended family is beautifully complex, but that complexity requires intentional Estate Planning. The law won’t read your mind or infer your wishes from how you lived. It will apply default rules that may not reflect your reality at all.

Whether you’re creating your first Will or updating an existing one, take the time to:

• Define who you mean by “my children” or “my family”
• Name your beneficiaries explicitly
• Coordinate your will with beneficiary designations on all accounts
• Document your intentions clearly to prevent disputes

A few careful sentences now can spare your loved ones years of heartache and tens of thousands of dollars in legal fees later. Your family deserves that clarity—and so do you.

Questions about your Estate Plan? Contact us to discuss how we can help you protect your blended family.